


I Thought You Were my Friend!

by FujoshiForBrownies



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: ? - Freeform, M/M, Other, Predator/Prey, Sad Ending, Why Did I Write This?, ciel is insane!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-22
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-17 12:39:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11275503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FujoshiForBrownies/pseuds/FujoshiForBrownies
Summary: in alois' last moments, he realizes he has nothing. no friends, no people who care about himand the earl ciel hated him, but never acted like itnow, as ciel grows more aware of his demonic hunger, he wants to  devour alois soul. can he?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is sad. just so you know

Ciel stared down at the writhing Earl beneath him, whose bright blue eyes were overflowing with tears. One pale, skinny hand was pressed to the wound in his stomach, which was oozing crimson blood. That was the wound Ciel had made. He had just stabbed Alois. And for what? Even Ciel didn't know himself, and yet he had just done it.

Alois sputtered, trying to get enough breath in his lungs to speak as he stared up at Ciel. The one and only friend he had ever had, who had betrayed him just like everyone else had. Tears choked his voice and blurred his sight, making his chest burn with more than the fact that he couldn't breathe. This was yet another betrayal that Alois had to go through, another person who had put on a fake smile and pretended to care about him. All of it had just been another lie. All of it. 

“W-why?” Alois whimpered, his voice finally cracking with the pain he was feeling. “Why, Ciel? I thought you-” Alois coughed, blood peaking on his lips. This was agony, all of it. As Alois looked up, he saw Ciel’s blue eye looking down, and that only aggravated the pain. In the other Earl’s eye, all Alois saw was cold disdain, a hatred for him that Alois had never thought to look for. All he wanted was another friend, and that had been torn from him as well! Ciel had never cared for him at all! 

“We're my f-friend!” Alois’ voice was raw as his tears burned and scoured his eyes, his vision now almost completely gone. It was a plea, a desperate call for help that he knew would be ignored. He didn't have anyone to call out to help him. Not even the maid Hannah. Oh, Alois had seen Hannah’s face when she saw Ciel. Caring, Alois thought bitterly. She never showed that to me. 

“Claude!” Alois tried to yell, but his voice failed and sputtered to a whimper. He cursed himself, cursed his weakness, all the things he didn't know and never cared to think about or notice. “S-s-somebody!” 

“Now that you're gone” Ciel spoke up, his voice calm yet bitter. How could he be so calm? He had just killed Alois! Did the Earl have a caring bone in his small body? “I won't have to worry about you interfering with my work. I can deal with her Majesty’s troubles.” 

“Tr-trou...b-bles?” Alois whispered. His voice was barely a breath, nearly indistinguishable between his harsh gasps for breaths and the sound of his crimson blood flowing out of the wound in his stomach. The wound…

Alois’ body contorted as he tensed, blood spurting out of his mouth in a torrent. Some of it splashed Ciel’s shoes, and he didn't even care, squishing it under them like Alois was a bug. A bug. Was that all he was to everyone? Just a lowly bug they could kill and be done with? Just a pawn? Did anyone care about him?!

“C-ciel…” Alois cried pitifully into his chest, not intent on being heard. Not like it would matter anyway to anyone. “F-f-friends...forgive each other...s-so..”

“I could never forgive you.” Ciel spat, kicking the vulnerable body of Alois Trancy. “You always bothered me. I could never get work done around here with you bothering me. Not to mention you looked horrible in that maid’s outfit.”

“Hor-” Alois coughed, his blue eyes closing. “Ible…?” 

And with that, Alois Trancy was dead.


	2. Starving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ciel realises sebastian is free to leave, but his butler doesnt seem as keen to leave as ciel does.  
> ciel is hungry, but for whose soul?
> 
> alois trancy's!
> 
>  
> 
> a little drabble about ciel and power

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> big thanks to alora pendrak for the insightful comment on ciel!

Ciel sighed, dropping to his knees, his black socks soaking up the blood that was slowly soaking into the floor. Dead. Alois Trancy was dead. All because Ciel didn't want to remember his past. And what did that make him? A monster?

 

Ciel remembered the words he'd told Sebastian once, that one time when they had visited the Renbourn Workhouse. Or what was left of it. It was in crumbling ruins, broken and desolate. Yet the circus members- the kidnappers- had tried to protect it.

 

“Once you lose something, you can't get it back.” Ciel whispered quietly, staring at the stiffening body of Alois Trancy. Both of them had lost something very similar. Their parents, their normal lifestyle, and their sanity. “No matter how hard you try..”

 

The blood was drying, turning a dark crimson red, and Ciel remembered what Alois had said that one day when he had worn that maid outfit. 

 

_ I wonder if your soul is that same illustrious blue as your eyes. Would my soul be the same color if- _

 

Ciel shook his head vigorously. It didn't matter. It didn't bloody matter. What's done was done, and there was absolutely no way to reverse it. But still, the demon inside Ciel wondered. Being a demon, he had noticed a hunger burning away in his stomach that he hadn't noticed before. It was a hunger, a craving, a  _ lust  _ for the souls housed in those human bodies. And the lust for power had followed, that urge that almost every being carried in themselves somewhere in the darkest crevices of their minds. A primal want to push everyone down to obtain the power they thought they needed. Survival of the fittest, Ciel assumed. 

 

_ -if i became one with you? _

 

“One with me..?” Ciel murmured quietly, unconsciously licking his lips. “As in, a contract?” Ciel raised his hand up and brushed off his eyepatch, revealing the covenant that was a bright lavender. It stammered for a second, then glowed brightly. Ciel smirked. Technically, the contract was null now. After having his soul devoured and being turned into a demon, he didn't need this. He was free to do whatever he wanted, right?

 

Right.

 

“Well, too bad.” Ciel snapped, feeling disgust rise up in his chest, choking him. “Claude only wanted my soul.”

 

Turning, Ciel fixed his mismatched gaze on Sebastian, who was looking on with a shocked gaze. “Well, Sebastian?” Ciel snapped again. “Isn't this what you wanted? To be with me forever!?”

 

Sebastian took in a breath from lungs that seemed to be choking him instead of bringing air like they we're supposed to be. “Not like this, my Lord.” Sebastian stammered. “You remember the rules of our contract!”

 

“ _ When it was still working… _ ” Ciel hissed, laughing slightly at his butler's gaze. “You and i are no longer held by those insipid rules. You're free. You know that, don't you?” When Sebastian nodded hesitantly, Ciel continued. 

 

_ “So why do you still linger?”  _ Ciel asked, his voice suddenly disembodied.  _ “I have no need for you now!” _

 

“Milord.” Sebastian's voice started off quiet, then rose in power, hellbent -pardon the pun- on matching his Master’s power. “I vowed to stay by your side forever, did i not?”   
  


Ciel turned away, leaning over Alois’ corpse. Hunger rose up strongly in Ciel’s core, and he licked his lips again. Suddenly, Alois’ soul seemed so  _ delicious.  _ He could just devour him right there……

 

“Forever has not yet ended, milord.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm open for requests on kuroshitsuji fan fictions!!!


	3. A Demons Hunger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ciel intends to devour alois' soul  
> sebastian doesnt think its right to do so  
> will ciel be able to fulfill the hunger inside him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, this is rather sad-ish. this chapter is rather odd. i have a carnivourous Ciel hellbent on keeping his 'prey' alois away from others.  
> its also written a bit differently than the others chapters, i think, so...
> 
> again, thank chu to alora pendrak for the insightful comment on the last chapter! these are really helpful with making the story go along.
> 
> i didnt think id want to continue this, but now i do. seeing ciel slip further and further into madness, much like with the mustard gas, is interesting and now we have grell to deal with ohno.
> 
> lol i like grelllll!

Ciel stared back at his butler, a confused look on his face. What did that have to do with anything? The hunger was nagging,  _ pulling  _ at him, urging him to just devour Alois’ soul right there and be done with it. He was so hungry, why was he so _hungry_?

 

Ciel leaned over Alois yet again, licking his lips as his eyes glowed with a lust Sebastian had only seen in other- more powerful -demons. It was obvious that Ciel intended to devour the young Earl’s soul. Sebastian understood his hunger -he too was starving after not being able to devour Ciel’s soul like promised -but a part of him still was disgusted. 

 

Sebastian assumed it was only because of a demon’s aesthetic. After killing Alois, Ciel intended to devour his soul as well. Like a true demon. But, this whole time, Sebastian felt like he knew less and less of the Earl he had nurtured over the years, watched over tenderly and cared for him. Now, in his place was a pink eyed demon, hungry for souls, who had just stabbed someone who was so like him. All because it had reminded Ciel of his past.

 

There was a soft sound, and Sebastian snapped back to attention, his own crimson eyes widening, though they didn't carry such a strong appetite for souls. Ciel had grabbed hold of Alois’ jaw with his bloodied hands, and had gotten up close with Alois. His bright eyes -both the lavender and blue one- were glittering. He was really going to do it.

 

Ciel placed his lips on Alois’ mouth, ready to suck his soul in, just as footsteps sounded outside. High heels.  But that didn't make sense. Claude Faustus was dead, and Sebastian had watched him die. Hell, he had killed him himself. So it couldn't be him. If it wasn't him, then who?

 

Realization struck Sebastian like a lead pipe. Grell Sutcliffe. Of course. There were only two people here that they knew of that would be wearing high heels, or had any reason to. But, there was also Hannah Annafellows, the maid. But, last time Sebastian checked, Hannah had been mourning Claude’s death.

 

There was a burst of red running across the room, and Sebastian’s shoulders drooped, realizing, with slight annoyance, that he was of course right. Grell had came to reap Alois Trancy’s soul.

 

Ciel tensed, and something that sounded like a primal growl sounded from his throat. Grell stopped, a confused look gracing his feminine face. 

 

_ What in the world? Did that little brat just  _ _ growl  _ _ at me?!  _ Grell thought, finding himself backing away. Cold sweat graced his body as he saw Sebastian standing a few feet away. Something was different about him, and Grell didn't know what. 

 

Being the flamboyant reaper he was, Grell was going to find out what.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys again for reading!


	4. Immaterial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> immaterial-something insignificant  
> a soul-important  
> memories of your past life....? who can say.
> 
> and a demon ready to devour your soul...? id say thats rather important.
> 
> especially when youre a grim reaper

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had intended for this to be a battle, but i thought this was better.
> 
> again thanks so much to alora pendrak!

Ciel sighed as he bowed over the corpse he had intended to devour. First, his own butler had tried to convince him  _ not  _ to eat Alois’ soul, and now he had to deal with Grell who was going to take Ciel’s meal?  _ I'm not about to give it up so easily,  _ Ciel thought. A small smirk came to his lips as he stood, looking the still confused reaper in his unique green eyes. 

 

Ciel rolled his neck, feeling something loosen inside his narrow body. It was thrilling, a freeing feeling spreading like wildfire throughout his body. Looking around, his pink eyes caught on the darkness -so much like shadows- spreading across the room. Ciel smirked.  _ Just like Sebastian. _ Ciel thought, noting Grell’s terrified expression.  _ I never liked Grell anyway! _

 

Grell swallowed, remembering his job. He had been sent here to reap Alois Trancy’s soul, and wasn't about to let anything get in his way of completing a job correctly this time. Revving up his chainsaw, a memory surfaced painfully, and Grell found himself choking back tears instead of driving his scythe into Ciel like he had intended to. Grell remembered when he had killed Madam Red to save Ciel. And now he was going to kill the very same Earl he had protected all those years ago. Did anything stay constant in this life? 

 

“This is a reaper concern,  _ brat _ .” Grell found his voice again, and Ciel simply smiled wider, sending the darkness farther to wrap around Grell’s lithe body. Grell was both surprised and embarrassed to feel tears coming to his eyes. He had failed again, and not only that, he was going to die. Again.

 

_ You are a grim reaper because you took your previous life….. _ Grell remembered William saying, and that simply made him cry harder. 

 

_ I can't die like this! There's so much i have to say!  _ Grell screamed inside his head.

 

“Unfortunately, you won't sate my hunger…” Ciel purred, bringing the reaper closer to him. “Seeing as your soul isn't as...agonized...as Alois’. But i'm so hungry it won't matter.”

 

Grell closed his eyes. Whether this was his end or not, he didn't want to see.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	5. Who Am I....?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> when your life flashes before your eyes, you begin to understand what you take for granted..and who has saved you more times than you can count

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> note, this is rather angsty. im reading blood bank so.... (*^*) shell is bae!
> 
> lol on another note, ciel is going to get some of his sanity back,.
> 
>  
> 
> ((i dont know how grell took his life to be a reaper, this is my idea))

Even with his eyes closed, Grell could still hear it. The darkness, slithering, crawling. Lurking around as it waited to devour it's prey. It was the very incarnation of human sin, their blackened hearts all personified in  _ this...very...moment. _ They say that when you're about to die, your whole life flashes in front of your eyes. 

 

But what if you're a reaper who took his life, to become... _ this _ ? This bizarre mashup of human and shinigami? A person who was stuck in their own sort of hell, captive to the deaths of man, all the while being unable to die themselves? 

 

The darkness pulled Grell closer, and he struggled to recognize anything  _ anything _  in the young Earl that was going to consume him. He couldn't see anything. If Madam Red or Lau or someone were to see him now, would they not recognize him as well? Would they see him as the beast he had became?

 

_ Is there anything to make him realize who he was? Who he IS? _

 

An idea popped into Grell’s head, and he reached for the chainsaw that was now pressed against his thigh, slowly drawing fat drops of crimson blood. Marring him. Pulling it out of his thigh, he held it up so it caught the rays of light coming off the chandelier. A reflection of Ciel flashed on the blade, winked out, and caught. 

 

For a second, Ciel was entranced. He stared at the reflection like he was seeing someone else. Like he didn't recognize himself. What was that...that  _ thing _ staring back at him? Pink eyes, pale skin? A murderous expression? 

 

Was that  _ him _ ?

 

Ciel gasped as the scythe caught into his arm, drawing blood as his Record spewed out of his arm. Ciel watched it, unable to tear his eyes away. His eyes….

 

His eyes we're changing from pink to blue!  _ This might just work!  _

 

The darkness receded, dropping Grell unceremoniously onto his back. Still in the throes of the terrifying experience he had endured, he tried to stand up, only to fall onto his knees harder than he ever had before. His heart was beating right out of his chest and his chest burned with tears as he sobbed violently, mascara running down his cheeks and face in black rivulets. 

 

Even being reborn as a reaper wasn't this terrifying. Oh, Grell could remember that as if it were yesterday, when in fact he had been a reaper for years. He could still see the white flash in front of his eyes as he lay on the cold hard linoleum, blood drying on his temple as his right hand still gripped the gun. He could see the reaper standing in front of him, death scythe out to bring him back to life.

 

_ William…. _

 

William had been the reaper to bring him back to life. No wonder he had clung onto him like a lifeline. Through everything, William had been there for him in so many different ways. Grell choked on his tears, lungs screaming for breath. He couldn't breathe through his tears.

 

Eventually looking up, he saw Ciel, who was gasping for breath as well. Dark blue eyes were open as he looked around, his eyes catching sight lessly on the corpse of Alois, then Sebastian standing next to him. Then they lighted on Grell.

 

“... _ Grell? _ ..”

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a tendency to drag things out in my story, so i thought it would be boring...  
> but its not, right?
> 
> anyway, i cant wait to write more!


	6. Extrication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> extrication-salvation, redemption, finality.
> 
> a release from this accursed hunger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is shorter than i usually write, i wasnt as inspired

Grell took in a shaky breath as he stared again at the Earl in front of him. Testing his balance and legs, he stood up, cautiously approaching Ciel. He  _ seemed  _ normal, but as Grell had learned, looks could be deceiving. Grell’s eyes caught on Sebastian. Deceiving, indeed. No one looking at Sebastian would think he was a demon. Well, except Blavat. Grell had always thought there was something... _ odd _ ..about that fortune teller. Anyone who could accurately pinpoint people’s lives could just as easily foretell their deaths, couldn't he? Did he have the power to change it as well? 

 

There was a noise from the Earl, and Grell gasped upon seeing him bent over Alois’ corpse yet again, the unmistakable flickers of hunger growing there yet again. Grell sighed, bending down to retrieve his chainsaw. Grell still had a job to fulfill, and he wasn't about to lose to that brat, even if he had tried to protect him in the past. 

 

The  _ past.  _ Not now. Now, much like Sebastian and himself, they were enemies. Grell revved up his chainsaw just as Sebastian stepped forward in front of Ciel.  _ Protecting _ him. Didn't he realize what was happening? He was going to let Ciel devour Alois? 

 

The shock of betrayal yet again flared up in Grell’s chest, cold and painful, and he swallowed it down. Grell had to act like William did whenever  _ he  _ reaped souls. Calm and indifferent. He didn't bring emotions into his work, so neither should Grell.

 

Ciel smirked. Even with their contract null and void, Sebastian was protecting him. 

 

“Just like a butler ought to do.” Ciel laughed into Sebastian’s ear, noting the butler’s look of disgust. “Right?”

 

“Y-yes my Lord.”

 

After that, Ciel leaned over Alois’ body, tasting the soul residing there in the kiss he gave. His growing, aching fangs nipped and bit at Alois’s mouth, as intent on devouring his body as he was on the soul inside it. After all, all a human body was to Ciel right now was just a vessel that housed the soul. Ciel took a deep breath, drawing the soul into him, delighting in its screams. As it desperately tried to cling to life. Ciel didn't care, and if anything, that made the meal even more delicious. There was a cracking sound as Ciel breathed in the last dregs of Alois’ soul, and the previous Earl’s body shattered into pearly, black shards.

 

Alois Trancy was dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -(*^*)/ sorry.

**Author's Note:**

> i warned you..


End file.
